Relationship Advice for AI
You know what’s really helpful in solving my own problems? Writing them down, sending them to someone, and not hearing back.
You ever do that? For me, it’s a bulletproof method to solving problems.
It’s akin to those moments when you go to someone with a problem, you talk it through, you find a solution, you thank them for their help, and they say, “Well I didn’t even say anything, but you’re welcome.”
If I have a friend, co-worker, or collaborator who I know is on the other end of a chat box, typing out my problem and not hearing back from them can be a tremendous help.
Here’s an example of how it often goes:
Jim Nielsen, Friday at 12:53 PM
I’m having an issue where the deployment isn’t working. Failiures are coming from lines 123-125 of the build script...
Jim Nielsen, Friday at 12:59 PM
Oh, it looks like something changed in commit abc123e in the lock file...
Jim Nielsen, Friday at 1:02 PM
This is so weird, I hate troubleshooting this crap. Why is everything in the world garbage?
Jim Nielsen, Friday at 1:03 PM
Ok, I can’t figure this out. I'm going to need your help when you have a second.
Jim Nielsen, Friday at 1:09 PM
Oh hey, actually I think I know what the problem is...
Jim Nielsen, Friday at 1:11 PM
Ok, it’s fixed now. Nevermind, I don’t need your help. Thanks!
Co-worker, Friday at 4:03 PM
You're welcome, glad I could help!
In contrast, AI is too eager to respond back with something when nothing would be much more helpful.
Knowing another human is there to connect with — available, listening, but not speaking — has helped me many times as I express my thinking step-by-step.
So let me give you some relationship advice, AI. Sometimes you don’t need to say or do anything. You just need to listen.
Cool? Thanks.